stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
