She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
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