New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
