we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I deserve this hangover.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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