So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
