Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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