There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize