We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
