I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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