sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Randomize
