New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
