whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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