I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
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We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
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he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize