His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
