Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
