u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize