I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
