forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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