What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize