I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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