I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
