so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
