I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
