If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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