I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
