all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
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He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
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The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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