Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
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