your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
