thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Randomize
