i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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