and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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