Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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