didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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