yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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