Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
