someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Randomize
