Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
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