What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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