I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
We left an ass print on the piano.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize