she was so not down for the gang bang
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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