I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Randomize
