Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
He felt like a one man threesome
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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