Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Go christen that room with your naked body.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize