Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
