wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
