Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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