Me. At least after what I've been through.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
