friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I stole a fireplace last night.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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