I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
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He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
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"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
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