"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
