I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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