"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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